[it's fine, Catra understands the urge. she still kind of wants to run, too. but. . . yeah. it wouldn't be fair. not now that they've shared this-- however unwilling the sharing has been]
[. . .]
[she lifts a hand and scrubs at her eyes, tail flicking back and forth at her feet]
. . .
Um--
[she]
[feels like she should say something, but she isn't sure what words she should use]
That little girl deserved to be loved. I don't know your history, but.... Adora believes in you... and you haven't given me any reason not to believe in you, either.
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[. . .]
[she lifts a hand and scrubs at her eyes, tail flicking back and forth at her feet]
. . .
Um--
[she]
[feels like she should say something, but she isn't sure what words she should use]
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Sorry..... you shouldn't have had to see that, on top of your own memory....
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. . . stupid. Don't-- [a sharp exhale]
It's not like you should've seen mine, either.
[not for privacy reasons, but-- experiencing Catra's awful mother figure on top of her own??]
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[ she swallows, though ]
It's... stupid... but.... I just wanted her to love me.
[ she'd only admit this to catra, who gets it ]
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[. . .]
[she steps towards Maya, gaze still affixed on the ground]
It is stupid.
[but it's more self-mocking than, you know, an insult hurled at Maya]
. . . because no matter how much I tried, she never-- she wouldn't. . .
She'd always pick Adora over me.
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[ she swallows, hard, to bite back her own tears, but quietly: ]
You deserve to be loved, Catra.
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I don't.
[she spits out those words, voice strained]
Not after everything I've done, so don't-- don't go saying that when you don't. . . you know know.
no subject
That little girl deserved to be loved. I don't know your history, but.... Adora believes in you... and you haven't given me any reason not to believe in you, either.
no subject
[. . .]
[but. . . again, she. . . doesn't, arms falling back to her sides. but she isn't exactly returning the hug, either]
Adora's-- stupid.
[so, so stupid, for holding onto her, for going back for her, for not abandoning her after everything she's done]
You'd feel differently if you knew half of the things I've done. Even one-fourth of them.